I have done a lot of "soul searching" the last few days since my mother's diagnosis. Not that it is determined how far or how bad it really is yet but having an ill parent really makes you question your own mortality. My mother is young, she's only 47... Yes, she drinks, she smokes, she has her entire life but so does a lot of people. Its not that we have a family history, or bad genetics its just that it happened I guess... So we are still awaiting more test results to really know the details and come up with a plan of action but the last 4 years of school has taught me not to lean too far to the hoepful end yet.
My mom and I both went to the doctor on the same day. I had my annual girl exam that I did not go to last year because at 26, been monogamous for 7 years, 2 perfect children never had an issue... well my pap came back abnormal... Great... just what i needed to hear two days after my mother is diagnosis with ovarian cancer. So I have another follow up with the GYN in a week. I haven't told anyone, I dont want to freak anyone out because its probably nothing but it just puts things in perspective.
My mom did a good job with us girls. There are me and two sisters, Im the oldest... All graduated high school two of us have degrees, two of us are proudly serving our country in the military, no one pregnant out of wedlock, no one addicted to drugs or bad habits. She did a good job basically on her own. She was successful at what was important to her, us... She is a good person you wouldnt believe the out pouring of love that has come out of this, I had two phone calls today from people I don't know and have never met who want to make her car payment this month and next since she is not going to be able to work... There are "tip jars" at two local clubs that she had worked at previously. to try and offset some of the bills she is going to have... there has been an ever growing line at the hospital and her phone has been ringing incessently. She is loved by everyone she has met and it is so great to see the impact she has had on these people.
I am frustrated with what my life situation is right now but I am thankful that I am able to do the things I am. I am not much in the mood for TMI Tuesday but am hoping to start feeling up to things again soon. I know not many read but to those who do... Thank you.
Hera, thanks for the beautiful update about your mother - she sounds absolutely amazing. It's always awesome to feel the outpouring of support in times like that. Really gives you faith in humanity. When my stepdad was sick (back in the 90s) his entire community rallied around us. We had firemen at our house doing yardwork, repainting the house, remodeling our living room, we had church groups dropping off groceries, casseroles, etc. It was amazing, and really helped us through a very difficult time.
ReplyDeleteMy thoughts are definitely with you guys.